(no subject)

[we_protect_each_other]

This is how I have felt all day. I feel so grossly incompetent to return to my job on Monday after this fall break. When I can breathe through it, I think maybe it's gonna be just fine. I'll be tired but maybe more prepared for this nine weeks. But then I experience the terror again. Why is being an adult so hard? I want to work closer to home so, so, so badly.

Comments

[butterflydreaming]

I'm sorry you're dread is wrecking your weekend. Are they rough on you?

Adulting is hard, I think, because we expect so much out of ourselves. I've met some people recently who are 10/15 years older than me and seem like they've never cared to put out much effort, and are fine with what I (am trying but failing not to judge as) being underachievers. It's such a different mind set that I'm astounded.

[we_protect_each_other]

I agree, but I'm not sure that's exactly what's going on for me. I'm a teacher and so the expectations on me are kind of standardized within my profession. When I worked in an office, I definitely could see what you mean, and I do see it some in my profession. I think that the issue here again comes from that whole thing where things have become more scarce in terms of ease of access to jobs, money, and resources in that time. We have learned that we have to perform for free before we will ever get compensated for our work, whereas entry level paid training kinds of arrangements were common even in my parents' generation to those in many professions.